“Thank God, O women, for the quietude of your home, and that you are queen it it. Men come at eventide to the home; but all day long you are there, beautifying it, sanctifying it, adorning it, blessing it. Better be there than wear a queen’s coronet. Better be there than carry the purse of a princess. It may be a very humble home. There may be no carpet on the floor. There may be no pictures on the wall. There may be no silks in the wardrobe; but, by your faith in God, and your cheerful demeanor, you may garniture that place with more splendor than the upholsterer’s hand ever kindled.” —Reverend T. DeWitt Talmage, D.D
I love this quote and thought I would share it.
Having grown up a less than ‘quiet’ home where bitterness and anger and sadness grew out of the old creaky floorboards beneath the faded, torn carpet, something in me responds to this quote. I remember as a child thinking about my future home and what it would look like. Beyond the fancy balustrades and crystal chandeliers and children named after my sisters (I don’t think I knew that many names!!) it was hard to put my finger on what exactly I wanted. I knew I couldn’t care less about a high-flying career (though how one would pay for those chandeliers who knows!!). I knew I wanted children. And I knew that staying at home with said children would be precious. I think there was a certain amount of fear when I thought about it all. Fear because I didn’t want to end up alone with children like my mum. Fear because i didn’t want to be struggling, I didn’t want my children living on old torn carpets or in rooms with cracked walls. I didn’t want them to be worrying every night about money. I didn’t want them wishing for riches and not appreciating what they already had. I was probably too young to be thinking about such things, but I remember the fear was very real to me.
As I got older I started to change my thinking. I’m independent. I can do this just as well as men can. I am equal to men. I am sometimes better than men. I don’t need a man, I can do this by myself. Putting immeasurable pressure on myself to get better. To break the poverty cycle we lived in. To raise myself from the ashes.
Notice I used a lot of ‘Me’ ‘Myself’ and ‘I’? I was selfish. I knew I wanted God in my life. But trusting him completely was huge. What if he didn’t give me what I want?
When I was 27 and diagnosed with Cancer, I remember finally realising what it was I really wanted.
To live. It didn’t matter whether I achieved or not. I just wanted to live. In peace.
That’s what was missing from those childish daydreams. A peaceful home. Just a simple home where people loved each other and lived in peace.
It took me a long time to work out that the only way of living in peace was By trusting in someone greater than me.
Why did I share this quote? I love the importance it places on the role of the home-maker. How we are instruments of peace in our own homes. That’s a pretty powerful role.
I still dream about chandeliers occasionally. but I’d settle for plastic ones.